In Henry Louis Gates’ essay, “What’s in a Name?” he
writes about an incident where his father could speak up about the prejudice of
colored people in Piedmont, West Virginia but he chose not to. Maybe he kept
silent because he knew it would not change anything. I also had an experience
where I should speak up about something but I chose not to.
I
have felt about this for several times. This feeling made me worry, angry,
down, and desperate and also a deep regret that always made an impression
in my mind. This is about an experience when I could say about something but I
chose to keep it inside. Almost
in every beginning of the new semester, the lecturer will ask the students to
divide themselves into several groups of presentation. I love working with team
but the one I hate is the method of selecting the members of group. Counting
randomly is not what I like because I knew that I will get members who I don't
feel comfort to work with.
That
morning must be hotter than it was. I remembered the date, it was February 14th
2013, yeah it was Valentine Day, and we had counting ourselves to find out our
own group. The day that must be so lovely turned out so evil. The leader of the
class chose to use the counting method to find out the group member. We argued
about the method of selection. Some students agreed that the selection should
be done by counting randomly but the rest had their own opinion why the
selection should not be done like that. Then we had a small discussion while
trying to make the situation became more relax. As the first begin, Mega stated
her opinion to the whole class member.
“Sorry,
may I speak? I disagree if we should do this by counting because I believe
that we will feel uncomfortable with friends who we don’t used to work with.
But if we choose our group member freely then we would be more excited to do this
assignment,” I heard Mega said that.
“I
do agree with Mega. Why? Because I think it is such a good way to find out our
own group by choosing it freely. We can work with whoever we like so then we
are confident enough to present it later,” said Elis.
Deep
in my heart, I agreed with both of them. I had the same opinion with Mega and
Elis. I hope at that time we could choose our own group freely because the other
time we had already asked to find the group member by counting. I thought it
would be so much better to do so. Yeah, I thought that way would be the best
for all of us. When we work in a group which consists of people who we like and
enjoy to work with, it will encourage us to do our best. Besides that, it will
effect the result of the work. Once we believe in someone to work with us, we
feel so much easier to finish the work, we could gain our confidence, and it’s stress free. How would it be when we should work with peers who we don’t even
feel comfortable with them? I’m pretty sure that we will have any doubt and
worry in our heart. What make it worst is, it would be one more factor that
will drive us to the stress zone.
But
then the leader of the class decided to have voting. A few seconds were gone,
and the result was most of the class member chose to have counting. I was wondering
how could it be. What made me felt more confused was knowing Mega and Elis
didn’t raise their hands. I assumed that they didn’t want to keep their
opinion. I realized that it won’t work if I try to stand in my way because it
won’t change anything. The final decision had been declared, so I chose to be
silent. I just didn’t want to have any longer debate or discussion with others. Although I had my strong reason and want to complain about that one, but finally
I chose not to.
As
the time goes by, I should learn from my experience for not to do the same
thing twice that I might regret it again. I just don’t want to do it all over
again. One day, if I find my self in the same situation like I did before, I will
make sure that I have my chance to speak it up. Maybe I should try a bit hard
to convince my friends that I have a logical reason to support my choice. So
then they could open their mind from the thing that they don’t ever realize
before.
